Capture Your Grief: Day 20

Favorite Charity/Organization

I could never begin to express my deepest most heart felt gratitude toward Jill Meyer, the volunteer photographer who took Abigail's pictures.  She gave me the most priceless and precious gift.  I treasure these pictures more than any other material possession I own.  Jill works for an organization called Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep (infant remembrance photography).  Jill arrived at Children's Hospital with only a moment's notice.  She was such a kind and compassionate person.  We will never forget her and what she did for us!

8 Months Since We've Said Goodbye

It's been 8 long months since we've said goodbye to our precious baby.  What a hard hard week it's been! I'm still in utter disbelief that she's gone much of the time. So thankful for all of our family and friends who remember Abigail and our pain.  You have shown me the kind of person I want to be. Compassionate and sensitive hearts mean more to me than I could ever begin to explain, and I will never forget the kindness and love that we have been shown.

Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones!
Proverbs 16:24

Luke sent 8 pink roses to me at work today for Abigail being 8 months old.  So sweet!


We attended an annual candlelight memorial service this past weekend for Abigail.  They read all the names of everyone who passed away in 2011 and in 2012. I love hearing her name! It was so wonderful to get to attend because it makes us feel like we are getting to do something for Abigail, especially since we won't get to have earthly celebrations with her. There was a special candle lit just for her and the whole cemetery was lit with candles. It was beautiful.  

8 Months Old

"Lord, hold my child close to You, and if You will, I plea, that as You hold her close to You, she remember when I held her close to me."

A dear friend shared this with me tonight: Psalms for the Grieving Heart

Saved by the Blood of Jesus

I have been pondering Abigail's salvation and my salvation since listening to John MacArthur's sermon on the salvation of babies.  I am joyful because I grieve with hope.  The salvation of infants who have died truly is a beautiful illustration! Abigail is God's chosen elect! Incredible. He saved her no differently than He saved me: by grace alone. I had no more to do with my salvation than she did. What reassurance of my own salvation! When I stand before Jesus on judgment day, He will evaluate my life and I will be held accountable for my sins.  I love to think about when Abigail stands before the throne, and He tells her "Well done my good and faithful servant!" And she was such a faithful servant because she is still changing our lives and causing us to lean on Him. She was born with a sin nature, but by His mercy she was snatched away to His loving arms before she had a chance to sin.  And I will get to spend forever with her, and my Redeemer.

A sermon by John MacArthur on The Salvation of Babies (Part 1)

"So, when an infant dies, he or she is elect to eternal salvation and eternal glory. So dear one, if you have a little one that dies, rejoice. Count not your human loss, count your eternal gain. Count not that child as having lost, but having gained, having passed briefly through this life untouched by the wicked world only to enter into eternal glory and grace. The true sadness should be over those children of yours who live and reject the gospel. Don't sorrow over your children in heaven, sorrow over your children on earth that they should come to Christ. This is your great responsibility, your great opportunity."

Here is the link.  You can read it while you listen, or just read/listen.  It is so good! 
The Salvation of Babies Who Die (Part 1)

Capture Your Grief: Day 18

Family Portraits